Children move with the image of words Let's say "Let's do it" rather than "Don't do it" [YOU are the best MOM] vol.39

It's difficult to talk to children, isn't it? Do you unknowingly say "Don't XX" such as "Don't run!" Or "Don't clutter"? However, negative words do not convey what parents want their children to do. Even if you're trying to call attention to what's happening or what's likely to happen in front of you, it's a confusing expression for your child. Children who are so careful do not know exactly what to do, so the behavior that parents want them to fix remains the same.

Children imagine movement from words. So negative words are counterproductive

The expression "don't XX" is called a "negative command". When my parents were children, I think they had the experience of being warned by their teachers, "Don't run in the corridor" and "Don't forget anything." However, since the child's brain imagines movement from words, when people say "don't run", the image of "running" comes to mind and makes me want to run more. It was counterproductive to say "Don't spill!" To a child carrying milk or juice. Just as you would imagine a pink dolphin when you say, "Don't imagine a pink dolphin," the child's brain can't understand the negative words, and the behavior that shouldn't be reversed becomes more conscious. am.

"Let's do it" is more transmitted to children than "Don't do it"

When telling children, affirmative words such as "Let's do it" are easier and more effective than negative words such as "Don't do XX". The reason is that "Let's do it" is easier to understand and put into practice immediately. For example, a child may be told "don't spill" but don't immediately know what to do. Instead, specifically say, "Hold it with both hands." It is easier and more effective to imagine the behavior. It's okay even after saying a negative word. By continuing to use it consciously at the beginning, you will gradually be able to use it unconsciously. It would be nice if you could continue and become a habit little by little, only when you feel comfortable.