Teaching “Responsibility” [YOU are the best MOM] vol.20

Let's teach children who have a lot of excuses "responsibility" without blaming them for failure.

Parents ask their children why they have problems or troubles, or if they fail to keep their promises. At that time, when the child makes excuses such as "But ...", the parents are frustrated with "Why isn't it straightforward!" And how can the cautions and advice be conveyed? You may be worried. Of course, children aren't the only ones to make excuses. You may have made excuses without thinking, either to assert your legitimacy or to match the mood of the place. Many children who make excuses are strong and sometimes blame others or something to protect themselves. If you are not a good child, you often have anxiety that your parents and teachers will not recognize you.

Don't ask the child's excuses, first accept the child's feelings

Haven't you told me to catch up with something like "Why do you just make excuses !?" Relentlessly asking your child is counterproductive. You may feel angry at the excuses and want to blame your child, but instead of doing so, it is effective to take the child's feelings once. Simply denying a child's behavior makes the child feel like he or she has been denied. Then, I cannot be honest. To prevent this from happening, it's important to listen to your child's story to the end and find out what to do in the end.

It's okay to fail! Don't blame for failure, let's teach responsibility for it

Children who make excuses or who cannot apologize obediently tend to be concerned about the evaluation of others, and it is often difficult to admit who they have failed or who have made a mistake. First of all, it is important to create an environment where children can think, "It's okay if you make a mistake!" To do so, do not blame the failure, but guide them to think about what to do when they fail and take action. If you teach them to think about failure and responsibility for it as a set, they will be able to accept anyone without blaming others.